Thunderstorm

" And we'll run together , with the grass under our feet and the stars above, forever" 

I thought I'd write about that dream. My dream.
He walked into the room. So cocky, so self-assured, with the kinda confidence I always wanted, but never could manage. He knew they'd stare. And they did. I did too. I couldn't help myself. Mr. Perfect, had walked into the room, giving me the, 'You'll never get me' look. I was bowled over right then.
Who knew, in a year, he'd be the guy I'd have the most fun talking to? That I'd be someone, he could share it all with? That I'd love him, despite of, or because of, how difficult he was. I hadn't thought it possible.
Yet, one night, he's on the phone, and he's telling me he likes me, and he wants me to date him, and I'm sure I'm dreaming, and its like I'm living another's life.
But it never works. Coz fate's against us. Everything's against us. He tries. When I'm not feeling too generous, I say he didn't try hard enough. But most days, I say he tried. He did all he could. I did too.
But how do two people, with everything going wrong for them, fight the odds?
It ended. Fading away. With no confrontations. Coz there wasn't time for them, either.
And yet, he won't go away. He's always right there, somewhere in the corners of my mind. I'm not lost, without him, yet he's still a major part of who I am.
He's the oli person, who I genuinely have fun talking to. He hasn't changed in almost 4 years. I know him, even things he's never said. I just get him. Like I've known him all my life.
He's the oli one who says the right things when I'm upset. He doesn't say things, to make me feel better, but they're the right stuff.
He's like a thunderstorm. He comes by, once in a while, but each time, he awes me, stuns me, and captures my heart again. He takes my breath away. And then he's gone again.
He's enough. For now. And yet, I dream of a future, where he's there for me, in every way there is, and then some. A forever, with him. I'm settling, but he's my dream. My thunderstorm. That flash of intense light, the roar of emotions, he wakes in me.
I've stopped trying to fight it. He's nothing I can explain, and everything that I understand. I have no words, to explain the man he is, and yet every word I've known and comprehended, has a bit of him in it.
He's part of my every moment.
He's a part of me.
My dream. My nightmare.
My thunderstorm.