Smile, Even When Your Cheeks Hurt, And Your Hand Is Burnt.

I'm doing my Bachelors in Hospitality and Tourism Management. A slightly glorified version, of the Hotel Management program.
Also, for now, I'm a glorified, and classier कामवाली बाई.
A major part of our course requirements, for graduation says, that in the First Year we need to complete 20 waitings. Waiter-giri basically.
My most striking waiting, out of 5 waitings, was the one at the Intercontinental-The Lalit. It was a Punjabi wedding reception. I had to do a mocktail service, and then the starter service.
I learnt a lot of things. One, Punjabis love food. Two, Punjabis love paneer. And three, Punjabis are loud.
The women looked down their noses at me. They would ignore my very presence if they didn't want what I was serving. Some women however, are highly amusing. There was this one, lady?, who I was serving soft drinks to. She's the size of a heavy-duty bulldozer, and has a face that looks like it got run over by aforementioned bulldozer. She has it in her, to ask me for a Diet Coke. Yes lady, that'll help you get skinny. Definitely.
Another, similarly sized lady?, with enough make-up to last Dolly Bindra, a year, picked up FIVE pieces of Paneer Tikka, and then says, in a terrible Punjabi affected American accent, "Eh my God, so much oil." And then winks at me like a fellow conspirator, saying, "Can you imagine the calories?" No, I can't. I'm not the size of a baby elephant. I don't count calories. Just money.
Oh, and the men. The dirty, sleazy bastards. I wear, man-pants, a shirt twice my size, and a waistcoat and bow. They still give me the eyeball, brush up all over me, and into me. I wanted to die of embarrassment. However, being a good student, I settled for smiling sweetly, and giving them every माँ  की, बहन की gali, I knew, in the safety of my head. They smoke like chimneys, and drink like fish!! And get a little drunker each time I pass them. And louder. Till I couldn't wait to serve them, just so they'd shut up as they ate.
A colleague mentioned, some old lady, with barely any teeth, kept pestering her for Fresh Lime Soda. We have reason to believe, the old crone, was not all there.
They complained that they weren't being served the starters. So they'd grab, and shove, and throw used cocktail sticks at me, give me dirty looks, if I eyed the way they ate etc.
The salver was heavy. I can safely say it weighed as much as a girl's over-night bag.. I burnt myself on the starter ka chotu plate and burner. Some kid, put ketchup on me. A man threw his half chewed Baby Corn Fritters at me, coz it wasn't hot enough. I was embarrassed, insulted, over-worked and sick.
All in all, one of my funnest nights ever! I felt like I was playing a part in a movie, or a stage show. It was amazing. And yes, I am a little weird, I'm ill, and on antibiotics. Cut me some slack.
But mostly, I'm just worried, a teacher will find this page, and I'll be kicked out of college.

Cheers!
The Cynical and Harassed, Romantic.
(: